An open letter to my beloved church. Written By. Chester Wenger. Times read. I am profoundly reluctant to write this letter because I know there are those it will wound deeply. But I have also come to the conviction that I can no longer hide the light the Lord has lit within me, under a bushel. I want to share with you what the Lord has been telling me and my dear life companion. First, a defense of my ministryif you will allow me to paraphrase the words of the Apostle Paul from Philippians 3 4ff. Ensure your personalized thank you wordings reflect your sincere appreciation and gratitude for all occasions Show Your Appreciation with Unique Thank You Card Wordings. In the United States, antimiscegenation laws also known as miscegenation laws were state laws passed by individual states to prohibit miscegenation, nowadays more. Essex Wedding Toastmaster and Master of Ceremonies for Hire based in Essex and providing services for Corporate functions, Training courses and a Toastmaster School. If someone else thinks they have reasons to put confidence in the flesh, I have more Baptized into a Virginia Conference Mennonite Church as a young boy, youngest son of a Mennonite evangelist and second president of Eastern Mennonite Seminary now EMU, AD Wenger. Mothered by a diligent student and teacher of the Scriptures, the oldest daughter of a Lancaster Mennonite Conference bishop and faithful to her Church in every way. At the request of Lancaster Mennonite Conference ordained in 1. Virginia Mennonite Conference for mission work in Ethiopia. Appointed by Eastern Mennonite Mission Board of Lancaster Conference as the Educational Director for the Mennonite Mission in Ethiopia. Founded and taught Bible in the Bible Academy of Nazareth Ethiopia which was established to train potential leaders for the budding Meserete Kristos Church. First elected chairman of Ethiopias Meserete Kristos Church, now the largest Mennonite church in the world. Happily turned the MKC chairmanship over to an Ethiopian who later was chosen and served as president of Mennonite World Conference. Began and taught in various educational programs in Lancaster Conference that were centered on Bible teaching e. The Virgin Mary, Nov 19, 2011 in Locutions to the World see Entry 26 Mary Why do I shout from the housetops Yes that is what I am doing. My words go forth by. Nintendo Switch The Kotaku Review. The Nintendo Switch is a fascinating new game console built around a novel and wellexecuted Read more Read. I recently set about researching the requirements for having a family member officiate a wedding ceremony in California. Heres the crazy weird thing. Traditional weddings arent for everyone, and if youre looking for something more intimate and personal, exchanging vows for the Justice of the Peace may be just. Desmond Mpilo Tutu OMSG CH born 7 October 1931 is a South African Anglican clergyman and theologian known for his work as an antiapartheid and human rights activist. Many romantic wedding ceremony readings and wedding day poem. These are beautiful wedding poems, songs and other writings about love from all over the world. Here are 21 Old Testament wedding readings about love, marriage, and commitment, along with their meanings. Keystone Bible Institutes, Paul Timothy Program. Former director of Home Missions of Eastern Mennonite Missions. Former pastor and still a member in good standing of Blossom Hill Mennonite Church, a thriving congregation of many young adults and young families. Lifelong student of the Bible and when it comes to quoting scripture passages I would be ready to compete with any one. Father of 8 children one deceased all of whom love the Lord and serve his Kingdom. Pleaded for patience when my congregation decided to leave Lancaster Conference over the womens leadership issue to join Atlantic Coast Mennonite Conference. When it comes to my desire to be faithful to the laws of God and to walk uprightly with my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, my children and many, many Ethiopian and US witnesses will vouch for my integrity. My life has been filled with much joy seeing God at work in numerous settings. Gods grace has been shown daily on my behalf. But as the Apostle Paul has said so well, whatever were gains to me I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. So, with all of the above acknowledged, what is the light Ive been hiding under the bushel When our gay young adult son about 3. Mennonite Church by a church leader, without any conversation with him or his parents, my wife and I grieved deeply. For many years, in the company of other grieving parents of homosexual persons, we have told our stories, read and reread the Scriptures. Most striking to us is that God, who created the world, who gave us Eden, also gives us the leaves of the tree for the healing of the nations. The world we live in is no longer the idyllic Eden. It is a broken, complex, messy, violent and yet wonderful world. Gods mercy filled grace infuses our broken world with a goodness that keeps surprising us with joyand healing. Gods grace also calls us to faithfully love God and neighbor above all else. The church we belong to has the power to bind and loose. Todays church, much like the early Christians, has the Spirit given power to rethink whether or not circumcision will continue to define who is in and who is out. Because of the brokenness of all sexualities that abuse, lust, access pornography, have sex with unmarried partners of the same or the other genderbecause of this brokenness, the church must rise up to reclaim a godly and wholesome sexuality a godly sexuality that is wholesome because it is covenanted, accountable to and blessed within the church not left to fend for itself outside the church a godly sexuality that is wholesome because it calls every one to recommit our bodies whether heterosexual or homosexual to be temples of the Holy Spirit, seeking first the Kingdom of God and covenanting to follow Jesus every day. When my wife and I read the Bible with todays fractured, anxious church in mind, we ask, what is Jesus calling us to do with those sons and daughters who are among the most despised people in the worldin all races and communities What would Jesus do with our sons and daughters who are bullied, homeless, sexually abused, and driven to suicide at far higher rates than our heterosexual children We know from Deuteronomy that eunuchs were a sexual minority, loathed and considered unacceptable for admission to the assembly of the Lord and yet in Isaiah 5. Lord says Do not let the eunuch say, I am just a dry tree.   I will give them a name better than sons and daughters. My dear wife Sara Jane and I love all of our children. We give thanks for the remarkable Kingdom work each of them is doing. We know that several of our children believe that the church should not endorse same sex marriage. And several of our children believe that same sex marriage is a faithful and godly choice when blessed by the church. While the tension around this issue is painful in our family, we continue to love each other, to sing, pray and play together. Our children all honor us with deep devotion and faithful careand genuinely enjoy each other. My wife and I are devoted to our Lord, with a firm commitment to the authority of the Scriptures. We strive to be faithfully obedient to Jesus. We invite the church to courageously stake out new territory, much as the early church did. We invite the church to embrace the missional opportunity to extend the churchs blessing of marriage to our homosexual children who desire to live in accountable, covenanted ways. We know that while many of us hear different things from the Scriptures, Gods deepest desire, as made known in Jesus Christ, is to seek and to save that which was lost. We believe this is an opportune moment for the church to boldly proclaim a pastoral, grace filled readiness to include both homosexuals and heterosexuals within the blessing of a marriage covenant designed to be wholesome and God honoring. This is the light that has been burning more and more brightly under my bushel, and I am now prepared finally, as a 9. So When the laws of Pennsylvania changed in July, our gay son and his committed partner of twenty seven years went immediately to apply for a marriage license. Subsequently they asked me if I would marry them. I happily agreed. We held a private ceremony with only six persons present. The drama minimizing guide to not inviting family to weddings. Photo courtesy of Flickr Commons. Ug. This is a post no one wants to write, but that definitely needs to be written. Most of us really do wish our weddings could be sweet celebrations of love and family, commitment and community. Unfortunately, for a whole bunch of legitimate reasons ranging from addiction to abuse, crime to communication problems, some of you are going to face the challenge of not inviting certain family members or ANY family members to your wedding. Its going to suck. Obviously, no one article can work for every tangled family situation, but lets see if we can help you make it suck a little less. Be sure. Were not going to get into why youre not inviting given family members. Were just going to assume that you feel youve got a really, truly legitimate reason. Its not our place to judge the legitimacy, and ultimately it doesnt matter if you feel it strongly, then thats your decision to make. You just need to be sure. Really, really sure. Talk to your partner. Talk to your friends. Possibly even talk to a counselor. This is going to be hard, so you need to be completely solid in your decision. Be accountable. Once youve made the decision, you need to hold yourself completely accountable. This is not about what the other person did to you. This is about you feeling like youre making the best decision you can for yourself and your wedding. As always, you cant control other people or their behavior. You can only control and take responsibility for your reaction. If not inviting family members feels like the best solution for a toxic situation, thats cool but dont make it about what they did. Own your reaction, and be accountable for the fact that the decision not to invite family is going to hurt peoples feelings, full stop. Even if you think they hurt you first, it doesnt matter. The decision not to invite someone is all on you. Be honest. The worst thing you can do when theres drama approaching is propagate it by not being up front in addressing it. Yes, its going to suck, but you cant put it off. You need to confront the situation quickly and directly. Dont put it off, and dont use platitudes. You likely do not ever need to contact someone to tell them theyre not invited to your wedding, but if they or another family member ask you about an invitation, we suggest you use straight forward, un charged language. Here are a few examples Im not comfortable having youthem attend our wedding. Im sorry, but my decision has been made. I understand this will probably be upsetting, but Ive made the difficult decision not to invite youthem to our wedding. Im just not comfortable with youthem being there. Im sorry. If you want to discuss why youre not inviting the person, by all means do but make it clear that the decision is final. We also fully support just drawing a boundary Its hard for me talk about the reasons behind the decision, because theyre emotional and painful. At this point, my decision has been made and it is final. Im sorry. Im done talking about this. Stand your ground. When other family members hear that youre not inviting someone, they may threaten not to attend your wedding. As one Offbeat Bride Tribe member shared Do not cave to emotional blackmail, do not cave and fight with people over this this is your choice and you have to stand firmly by it. Im sorry you wont be there but thats your decision is your mantra, your rock, your hard place and your go to reply. If you cant not cave, dont start this. I cannot stress that enough. My policy is to discuss my decision once with a person and then no more. If someone presses, I give them a warning I am not going to talk about this any more. Then end the conversation if the warning is not heeded Well, I have to go now. Love you, talk to you later. Refuse to fight over it. If someone starts debating your decision, give them a warning that its not something you want to discuss. If they dont respect that, then politely end the conversation. Dont get triggered into arguing or rehashing old wounds. Its not worth your time. If your decision has made, then all fighting over it accomplishes is wasting time and energy better spent elsewhere. Be loving, but be firm. If someone starts fishing for an invitation, politely refuse to do battle. Simply state that the person will not be receiving an invitation, and then respectfully decline to answer further questions. This has been a really difficult decision, but its one I feel very firmly about. I dont want to talk about it any more, Im sorry. Focus on the family you ARE inviting. In getting ready for the wedding, focus on the people who you DO know love and support you. Find friends and family who you can count on and spend some time thinking about how awesome that is. Thank those who are involved in your life and find ways to recognize what they mean. You could even add a bit to your ceremony telling them that if they were there, they are family. Try to minimize times that would highlight your family not being present, if possible. Be aware of all wedding moments where both families are usually included, and find ways to feel good about your friends andor partners family stepping in, or consider to minimize the family moments. Allow yourself to grieve. It can be hugely valuable to take the time to acknowledge and grieve the loss of an important relationship or any huge disappointment, regardless of how it happens. Yes, make this wedding your own and celebrate what you have, but also acknowledge to yourself that you are grieving some lost relationships, and that grieving will be an important part of letting go and moving on. Be compassionate. Yeah, this is going to suck. Yeah, youre going to find yourself in truly awful conversations that could dredge up a lot of painful family history. But challenge yourself to find as many ways as possible to be loving, appreciative, and gracious in your conversations about not inviting family. If family members push to come to the wedding, consider whether youre open to repairing your relationship with them separate from them attending the wedding. Obviously, estrangement is always an option and in some situations, it may be your best option. Ultimately, there are relationship dynamics here that are much larger than just a wedding invitation, and its worth considering carefully whether, once your wedding is over, you want to leave the door open to reconciliation. Seek help. In certain situations, there may be issues like restraining orders involved. In some cities, the local family court may have helplines or a help desk where you can ask for legal advice related to extreme situations like restraining orders. Wed love to hear from couples whove got through this challenge what methods did you use to minimize drama What language did you use to talk to both those who were not invited, as well as those who WERE invited and upset by your decisions